Somewhere along the way we were taught that our major parenting responsibilities come when our children are toddlers and elementary schoolers, granted our most demanding physical attention is needed at that time, but having raised 3 children past that stage, I now know that some of our toughest times as parents come when they are young adults and beyond.
I was lucky enough to be home today around noon when my 19 year old got up to start his day. In my experience being there when they are ready to open up and talk is the real challenge, it's not something you schedule like , "I'll be home at 5:30 to have a deep meaningful discussion.....
see you then." It's more like every star and every planet coming into alignment at the exact same moment, and thankfully that happened for me today.
Implementing all my skills of being non-judgemental yet wise, I was able to help him with some relationship challenges. He brought up discussions he'd had with friends and conclusions they had come to , all valuable yet based on the experiences of 19 year olds . For me to then be able to broaden his perspective and share what I've learned about people, relationships and love over the last 50 plus years, and to actually have him hear it was a truly gratifying moment as a parent.
I don't know, maybe since I've renovated many houses , a true "Fixer-upper at heart", I feel my children's angst, if they are in pain so am I ( I know boundaries are my issue... we'll talk about that some other time) But the truth of the matter is, I know my children will have to learn most things the hard way, I'm just grateful at this moment in time that I was there when he wanted to talk and that I had the words and the wisdom to open his eyes and heart to some new ideas and concepts, and that we have the kind of mother-son relationship which allowed him to hear what I had to say.
For me a great day as a mother..................
